Thursday, November 24, 2005



November 24, 2005. The American Official Thanksgiving Association today announced its Top Ten thanks for 2005. In random order, they are:

President Bush gives thanks that another year has gone by without use by Iraq of its nuclear warheads.

Congressman John Murtha gives thanks for the warm embrace by the Bush administration and Republicans in Congress of his plans for withdrawal from Iraq.

Vice President Dick Cheney gives thanks that Halloween is over and his photo is no longer being used to frighten little children.

Tom Cruise gives thanks for another year of privacy for himself and Katie Holmes.

Prime Minister Tony Blair gives thanks for another year of total public and political support for his decision to have Britain follow George Bush to war.

Dan Schorr gives thanks for another year.

George Clooney gives thanks for having survived a year of intense activity in making movies and in living up to his role as sexiest man of the year.

Osama bin Laden gives thanks for another year of successful operations without capture since the United States is busy with its war in Iraq.

The White House turkey gives thanks for its pardon and for getting away from this untruthful White House, which said it would be a beloved pet, just like Spot.